Thinking about quitting? If your dream job turned boring (soul-killing, toxic, unbearable…), you’re probably in a rush to clean out your desk, high-five your coworkers, and joyfully leap out of your office window. Before you do, we have a few “don’ts” to consider if you ever want to work again. Or not. It’s your thing.
1. Burn ALL Your Bridges. Torch them. In writing. Send a #company-wide email listing every grievance you’ve had on the job. Name names. They say even the worst job is a learning experience, but who cares what THEY say anyway?
2. Leave it Like a Wrecking Ball. Quit without #notice. Hell, don’t even call or email…unless you want to take the opportunity to pop your top and vent all the frustration you’ve been bottling up in the form of personal insults directed at your boss.
3. Roll the Dice. Don’t have another job or source of income lined up, and definitely don’t have savings. Cash in your 401K and party like it’s 1999. We’re not calling you stupid, but someone will.
4. Take Your Friends Down With You. Nothing says “FREEBIRD” like quitting and convincing others that they should do the same. We’re looking at you, 1996 Tom Cruise in Jerry Maguire. You do not complete us.
5. Leave Your Employer Hanging. Update your project status? Ain’t nobody got time for that! Your coworkers are smart; they’ll figure it out. Besides, by the time they find out, you’ll be long gone anyway, right? Not your problem.
6. Save the Best for Last. Sure, the general rule is that your boss should know first, but why should you care? You have weeks…nay, MONTHS, to spend slacking off and trashing your company to any coworker who will listen.
7. Quit in Place. Just stop caring. Let things slide for a while, maybe check out a few Craigslist job listings (though that might cut into your Reddit browsing time). Extra points for posting a pic of your boss’s face to Instagram when he/she catches you slacking off!
8. Misery Loves Company. And pain is a good teacher. Did you actually give notice before quitting? Well, now you have plenty of time to “educate” your boss and coworkers about why you have to leave. They should be thankful for your constructive feedback.
You should also get a face tattoo. Enjoy your newfound freedom/daytime television!
(GIF source: Giphy.com)
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Mary Lund says
My son is 17 years old and is working for Burger King in Avis PA. He was getting 8 hours a week and now down to 3 hours a week. He went in tonight to get his schedule and some of them started to laugh and made some remarks about him. He came home crying because he does not understand why people hate him so bad. I know that this company has put teens on the grill and fries. When I worked for them no teens were aloud in the kitchen at all. I hope you can give me some advice to help this situation out please.
We're sorry to hear that Mary. That's terrible. The best thing to do is have your son talk with the manager, so the issues are known. If he's needing help getting the hang of working the grill or other equipment, the manager should provide training and encouragement. Also, if other employees are creating a hostile work environment, the manager should correct that as well. Worst case, if the manager isn't helpful, he could always try contacting the owner of that particular location to let them know about the issues. Most managers or business owners appreciate and will go out of their way to help someone that shows they just want to work and learn. Best wishes for your son, and hope things improve soon!